big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
