is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
