I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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