you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
