Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
the liver wants what the liver wants
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Randomize
