I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
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