So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
