Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
