Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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