ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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