I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize