Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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