Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
