turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
