he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
