Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Randomize
