It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
