The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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