Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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