i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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