Come see our sink grown plant.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
