fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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