Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
