Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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