i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
