Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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