he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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