I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
