out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
