Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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