Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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