; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
