god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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