One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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