Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
