I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
