i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
