How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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