She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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