why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
The feeling are messing with the penis
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
