Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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