ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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