this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
