I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
