I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
