carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
