Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
