Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
