I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Sorry about my life...
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
