16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
